Andrea’s Story at 12 weeks Post-Birth
My situation is pretty unique. But then again, the more I talk to Mother’s with bubs the same age as my little boy, I feel like I’m not the only one going through this emotional roller coaster.
Here’s my story at 12 weeks post-birth.
I’m originally from Sweden and my partner is from Australia, so we went back to Sweden to have our baby boy.
Coming back to Australia now I knew I needed to get into the community to connect. Because going through this journey is amazing, but also can be very lonely.
We arrived back in the country just last week and jet lag, plus lack of sleep in general is just testing with us. This morning I just didn’t want anything to do with anyone. I just wanted to go to a warm tropical destination and be, by myself.
No tears, just the calmness of the beach and me.
Is anyone else experiencing double guilt?
Guilt that when your baby is crying at you, you just don’t want to be with him anymore, but then he smiles and you feel guilty about that you almost disliked your baby for that moment.
I love him more than anything, as I do my partner, but sometimes I just want to be freed of the responsibility, even just for a few hours. To get some of me back, and to feel on top of it again.
I’m used to being productive, efficient and actually achieving stuff.
I’m proud of what I achieved with my career, and just so blessed to now be a Mother. But it comes with its challenges.
I haven’t started a Mother’s Group yet, but looking forward to that.
Joining in the PregActive Mums and Bubs has been incredible, I’ve only been two weeks now. All the mothers are going through the same thing as me, and they are all so accepting of where I’m at.
It’s nice to not feel judged, and more so to feel supported. To get out of the house is a big step, to get out of the house and do something that’s for me is an even bigger step.
It’s a journey, and that’s for sure. I’m not really sure what’s around the corner beyond this first 12 weeks, and the scary thing is I don’t really have full control of it either.
Learning to let go it hard, but doing something that’s for me is one thing I’m proud to say will be a priority for me so I can be the best Mother to little Toby.
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